Archive for the ‘Comedy’ Category

Rock of Ages

2012

Starring: Julianne Hough, Diego Boneta and Tom Cruise

When trailers started popping up for this flick I was pretty excited. It looked to be a darned good movie. I mean, look at the cast and the music… How could you go wrong?!

SWEET MOTHER OF GOD did they go wrong!! and in so many ways. It was like a musical train wreck that you just couldn’t stop. A TWO HOUR auto-tuned nightmare. I just kept staring at the screen, eyes locked if not in disbelief then in pure horror of what was unfolding before me. You could have cut off a toe and I probably wouldn’t have noticed.

Their first wrong doing was when the girl Sherrie (Hough) gets off the bus and starts singing “Just like living in paradise” when she should be singing “Welcome to the Jungle”. The scene isn’t paradise at all it’s the complete opposite. Come on people! {face palm}

I must admit, I did giggle once. It was when Drew (Boneta) got up on stage for the first time and sang. After he finished they panned over to Lonny (Brand) and he and another guy had their lighters aflame. A salute to rock ‘n roll.

OH OH OH! Let me not forget get the “I think I’m Gods gift” pseudo star of the flick, Tom Cruise as Stacee Jaxx. Good grief! Because his ego wasn’t big enough, they made him a friggin’ rock star! And of course he’s got the slutty sluts hanging all over and such… HURL!

Who approves this shit?! Apparently these 80s bands needed some hard cash to let this happen to their classic tunes. Such a sad day in music history.

I won’t be recommending this movie… even to a coma patient.

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Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted

2012

There may or may not be spoilers. Read at your own risk!

I went in to Madagascar 3 expecting it to be as entertaining as the previous two Madagascar movies. Boy was I wrong.

This had to be one of the most boring kids movies I have ever watched. What the hell was DreamWorks thinking?!

The plot, for the most part, was far too serious for children and the Russian tiger was just a bit too mean and scarey. There was a slutty leopard or cheetah (whatever) that should have been toned down a bit, or maybe all female Russian animals are trampy.

In trying to lighten things up a bit they tossed in a dimwitted seal lion from what sounded like Italy. Ya, he wasn’t funny either, just dumb.

Halfway through the movie the Russian tiger is still a complete grumpy jerk who needs a big bottle of vodka to loosen that stick outta his bum, and I have yet to laugh more than once (we’ll come to that). This movie is the biggest stinker.

Oh… lest I forget the fat bottomed animal catcher woman that MUST get her lion. She will stop at nothing and I mean nothing. This goes beyond cartoon far fetched. At one point I wanted to smack her with a frying pan she was so annoying.

I truly hope this is the last Madagascar movie they make, as some things just need to die.

I wouldn’t recommend this movie unless you have 93 minutes of your life you no longer have a use for.
DreamWorks, you have F.A.I.L.E.D… ya, you heard me.

Now, for the part I laughed at… see below, the ONLY funny part of the movie…

The Five-Year Engagement

(2012)

Starring: Jason Segel, Emily Blunt and Chris Pratt

The Five-Year Engagement… I don’t know what I was thinking when I started watching this movie. I can’t stand Jason Segel, he’s just not funny. At all. And spending approximately 124 min watching him whine was torture. I wanted to reach into the TV and punch him in the back of the head.

I suppose this movie would have been more fun if they would have chose a different leading man, say… ANYBODY ELSE. There’s a great storyline and the other actors are wonderful. There weren’t even any face palm worthy lines. That’s a major bonus.

Anyway, if you can get past Mr. Segel and his unfunniness then you’ve got a decent movie. For me, it was a toughy.

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Mirror Mirror

(2012)MirrorMirror

Starring: Lily Collins, Julia Roberts and Armie Hammer

Mirror Mirror was absolutely ridiculous! I sat through the whole movie just shaking my head wondering why I was still watching it.

I have to give props to Julia portraying the evil Queen, she did so in a spectacular fashion. Her facial expressions were top notch.

Everything else… just plain crap.

I’m giving this movie three steaming piles of doggie poo.

Mr. Popper’s Penguins

2011Mr Popper's Penguins

Starring: Jim Carrey, Carla Gugino and Angela Lansbury

Mr. Popper’s Penguins turned out to be better than I had anticipated. Jim Carrey was his wacky self but didn’t go over the top.

I found myself laughing quite a bit and that’s pretty rare for me with a Jim Carrey movie. Must have been the penguins. HA!

I can’t say too much about Mr. Popper’s Penguins without giving too much away. I just know that I will probably be adding this to my collection of DVDs in the near future. It is that Fantastic! Well, that and I just love penguins!!

I truly think you, and your kids if you have them, will enjoy this movie. Give it a whirl!

50/50

201150/50

Starring: Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Seth Rogen, Anna Kendrick

50/50 was the final movie I watched in 2011. I have to say, I saved the best for last.

Levitt gives a great performance, one of his best to date.

Adam (Levitt), a 27-yr-old  who works at a radio station, has just been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. With the help of his best friend (Rogen) his therapist (Kendrick), Adam struggles through to beat the disease and discover what is most important in life.

Through all the emotions Adam goes through he manages to keep his sense of humor and a sense of calm.

50/50 is a great movie, I highly recommend it. I have to say, it is emotionally challenging at points but definitely worth watching.

Crazy, Stupid, Love

2011Crazy, Stupid, Love

Starring: Steve Carell, Ryan Gosling, Julianne Moore, Emma Stone

Crazy, Stupid, Love is a fantastic movie!

Cal (Carell) and Emily (Moore) have three kids and are happily married, until Emily asks for a divorce. Cal, newly semi-single and depressed needs to find his his way in the singles scene after a 25-year hiatus, and Jacob (Gosling) is just the man for the job.

With Jacob’s help, new clothes and a few lessons on finding the manhood he lost many years ago Cal is on his way. First pickup, the ‘sexy-cute’ school teacher…

Seems after the first one it’s not so hard, Cal is pickin’ ’em up easy as pie… until his wing man goes AWOL. It all starts at the parent-teacher conference…

Watching the end of the parent-teacher scene a line from Dan in Real Life kept running through my head, “I am the murderer of love”. Now, if you haven’t seen it, you must.. It’s pretty good.

And by the way, it is.. Love… Crazy, Stupid that is..

Two thumbs way up.